It has been an incredible nine months of growth, self discovery and wonder but even so it is hard not to look back in time and reflect on all the good things that we put on hold back in Santa Monica. Last June we started an amazing journey and now we need to decide wether to bring it to a close or to embrace it as our path to walk towards the future and keep going. So, what do we want?
Going back to Santa Monica feels safe. We had built a great life for our family that gave us security and stability: a well-paid stable job for Jeff that was demanding and stressful but also challenging and empowering, a school system where Pia, Marcus and Clara could go back to and continue on their journey through education with their friends, expected and familiar mommy duties (and ideally an added a part-time job to start writing a new chapter for myself), a few vacations a year, good friends old and new, visits with the grandparents, yearly Christmas and Thanksgiving celebrations surrounded by family, weekends in the wine country… Going back to life as we knew it could continue to flow comfortably for many years to come. Some adjustments along the way, expected milestones achieved, some challenges here and there (nothing super major assuming that everybody stays healthy and that we all continue to nurture each other emotionally)… Pretty good!
Continuing forward on our journey is challenging but, what comes with Challenge? Over the past nine months challenge continues to bring us much growth and satisfaction emotionally, creatively and intellectually. Emotionally we are learning to live with the uncertainty of not always having control. Living with uncertainty is allowing us to develop our capacity to be more open, confident and tolerant to roll with the twists and turns of life. Creatively we have become resourceful at building a new life from scratch. A life built from the inside out, from deep in within us towards the world. Our motor is self-motivation, our incentive is our family unit, our goal is our journey day to day, moment to moment. Intellectually we are learning by doing, by trying, by falling, by standing up again, by taking turns, by succeeding, by falling again…
There are many variables that still confuse us and all our steps forward come with many unanswered questions and few rational answers…
- As much as Pia, Marcus and Clara love Bali and Green School, Santa Monica resonates as home to them and trying to reconcile their two worlds is a big undertaking for their young hearts. Is it fair to them that we have turned their world upside down?
- Regardless of our geographical location and looking into the future, Jeff and I are reinventing ourselves professionally. How do we support our family financially from now on in a way that we can achieve a more balanced work-life journey?
- We have experienced and witnessed the enormous value and impact of learning by doing, surrounded by nature, in a wall-less school. Is it possible to go back to traditional education after a year at Green School?
- We have learned to live with less possessions. The freedom of a simple life… Do we need all of those possessions back?
- We know we thrive diving into new cultures and expanding our horizons. The world is a big place and we do not want to make it small. How do we sustain it?
- We need to pass on our heritage to our kids but we don’t want their roots to stop them from being citizens of the world. How do we find the balance so they have a sense of belonging while also understanding the importance of learning and borrowing from other cultures?
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The answer to most of these questions is “I don’t know”… but what I do know is that life is good, really good, especially with all the ups and downs. I know that for the last nine months we have all been growing and thriving through thick and thin. I know we fight like never before but we also love like never before. I know that we feel excited about today and we will deal with tomorrow when the sun rises again. I know that family and good friends are forever, regardless of time and space. I know that our gut tells us to continue on our journey even with all the uncertainty, even with all the unanswered questions… So, against all odds, here we go again: year two in Bali here we come!
theintrepid5: the Kaltreider adventure 